I. AIMS
Clutter seems small, but it is a problem that most writers have as they are familiar with the way of thinking in Vietnamese that prefer implications and hedging. Aiming at shorter, more concise, and higher-quality Summerian products, writers should apply techniques in writing to:
- Put less effort into redundant details to save time.
- Improve the naturalness of each summary to get a higher assessment.
- Reduce the editing time.
II. CLUTTER’S RED FLAGS
- Passive voice: Passive voice makes sentences wordier. Use active verbs instead. Only use passive voice if you do not know who the subject of the action or the object is more important than the subject (in this case, writers should discuss with editors in need).
- Do not use ”concept nouns”: Concept nouns are broad, generic nouns that can describe too many things. They need to go with an explanation. Or better yet, just use precise, specific nouns.
E.g., The summary of The Story of Stuff
Fortunately, unveiling the system is the first and most crucial step towards changes. By determining the true root, we will have the right approach to solve the problem.
Vs.
Fortunately, pointing out the role of capitalism is the first and most crucial step towards changes. We now know the solution: a difference in the economic model.
Here, “capitalism” is the problem, and “an economic change” is the approach. They are specific nouns. They give a name to a particular system, a particular approach; they show concrete situations and concrete actions instead of the broad, generic feel of “system” (Which system exactly? What does it look like?) and “approach” (Which approach? What does it look like?)
- Modal verbs: Modal verbs like “can, may, might …” are usually overused. They represent nuance in meaning. Don’t use it unless the authors themselves use it.
- “There is, there are”: After writing the sentence, try deleting this phrase to see whether the meaning changes or not. If not, delete it.
For e.g: If your customers cannot afford your service, there is no need to convince them vs. If your customers cannot afford your service, don’t convince them.
- Adjective/Adverb/Redundancy: “essentially important,” “advance forward,” “potential future.” See how useless these are? Most adjectives and adverbs are unnecessary. Consider deleting it and finding a precise noun/verb for what you want to say whenever you use one.
- “That” or “Which” clauses: Only use these clauses when you have new information to provide.
E.g. 1: Change the rules that govern us vs Change the rules
The rules are understood to govern something, so the clause after that is redundant.
E.g. 2: When Netflix expands and comes into the globalization phase, it has to mingle its corporate culture with the local customs and traditions, which vary from Asia to Europe to America.
In this case, the clause after “which” clarifies the previous information, so it’s a good use.
- Multiple-verb sentences: Too many verbs together clog your sentence. And that means all your verbs are weak, as they can’t deliver the information on their own. Whenever you find two or more verbs together in one sentence, stop and revise it. You can find a single, more robust, better verb.
E.g., He makes great efforts to achieve his success. Nope. Just go with “He strives for success.”
- Deadweight: “As it can be known/ has been shown,” “It can be regarded that,” etc. Delete them, just go straight to the point.
- Prepositions: The prepositions (most often at the end of a clause) that bring no new information, clarify nothing, that are too obvious because the context is already made clear beforehand. Whenever you see the prepositions, try getting rid of them.
E.g., First of all, as marketers have to access different customer information every day, they get overwhelmed by the amount of information and material available. They can hardly distinguish between useful and useless information about their customers, probably due to the lack of a convenient filtering tool.
Here, of course, they get overwhelmed “by the amount of information”, they can’t be overwhelmed by anything else since the previous clause has specified that it’s “customer information” already. And of course, this useless information is “about their customers”, the first sentence already said that it couldn’t be information about anything else. The context is already set. “About their customers” here is useless information.
E.g., You don’t become a nice guy by thinking you are awful, but you will turn over a new leaf by forgiving yourself vs You don’t become a nice person by thinking you are awful, but by forgiving yourself.
And that’s that. Good luck with your next summary 😉
Summerian Writing Academy 